If you're anything like me, you've probably heard countless stories about the Israelites and how they were a people set apart by God. He was not only their God but also their king and he protected them fiercely, making examples of their enemies time and again. I however couldn't stand the Israelites. They always struck me as highly ungrateful and I recall rolling my eyes whenever I came across yet another scripture passage of them falling God's hand.

The Book of Samuel

I recently came across one of these eye-rolling moments while studying the book of Samuel. Apparently, the Israelites woke up one fine morning and told Samuel that they wanted a king. Prior to this, they had no king but had judges instead. Not like they needed one because God himself was their king. This was however not enough for them, looking around, they saw that other nations had human kings and decided that they wanted to be just like the others. The Israelites were tired of the special treatment they got from the King of kings and wanted to be ordinary. Blending in with other nations was important to them, so they rejected God as king over them.

Samuel took their request to God, and God gave them a warning. He told them that they would be exploited and oppressed by the king they were asking for and that they would basically be on their own when that happened because he, God, would ignore them. Do you know these people went ahead and insisted that they still wanted the king like that? They got their request in the form of Saul and if you go through the book of Samuel, you will see what they went through under his reign.  

Am I an Israelite?

I was really upset when I read this and couldn't believe the effrontery of the Israelites. I turned to my husband and went on a tirade about how annoying they were. While on my self-righteous rant, it became clear to me that I had been just as arrogant and silly as the Israelites a couple of times in my life with regards to some of the things I had asked of God. I recalled times when I had gone on to pray for specific things without first asking what God's will in these situations was.  There were even times when I had intentionally gone on to do these things even without consulting him because I knew in my heart that there was no way he would approve.

The scariest part of the book of Samuel for me was the fact that God granted the Israelites their request even though it was not his will for them and would definitely end in tears. This shook me to my core because I used to take granted prayers as a sign that I was moving in the right direction. What if I only got them because I had insisted on my own way, and closed my eyes and ears to God's warnings regarding them?

Something else that struck me about this story was that God did not give the Israelites Saul as a king just to punish them. Despite their foolish ways, he loved them. It was unfortunate that of all the Israelites alive at the time, Saul was the most qualified to be their king and that was why he was chosen. Saul with all of his issues was the best king they could get and this was one of the reasons God tried to warn them off the idea. He knew that they would regret it, and they did.

After Saul, a long line of kings ruled Israel. Some good, others not so much. If you read further down, you will see how the Israelites suffered in the hands of their kings. This is what happens when you insist on your own way instead of bowing to God's infinite wisdom and will for your life.

Surrendering to His Will

These days, I try not to pray specific prayers that are outside of the scripture. If I can't find it in God's word, I ask for his will to be done regarding that situation. I know God loves me and is merciful, but I also recognize that he is a just God who does not fail to discipline his children when he needs to. I would much rather ask in line with his will than do my own thing, which will end in tears for me. I trust that He has a higher purpose for my life regarding these specific situations.

Thinking about it, it sometimes seems futile to ask God for specific things because even the best things I can think to ask for with all of the ideas and thoughts I have amassed in my years alive can only fall short of the glorious plan he has for my life because my human mind cannot even begin to comprehend it. There are times where I have in the past asked God for things from the smallness of my mind and he went and did things that I would never have imagined possible for myself.

A Short Story

I remember back in 2017, I had been seeing this person for about 4 years whom I was convinced was "the one". I held on to this love for all the wrong reasons and remember praying to God countless times to bless the relationship. Not once did I ask for God's will to be done concerning it because I was afraid he would say no to it and I would have to let it go. So I held on and used all of my strength to ensure that things panned out the way I wanted. Like all things we try to do without God, it took a lot from me emotionally and mentally and I got so weary that one particular day, I ran to church, knelt down at the altar, and repented of my trying to play God with that aspect of my life. I told God that I was tired and could no longer carry this by myself. I placed it into his hands and asked for his will to be done. I asked God to please remove the relationship from my life if it was not his will for me. A way for me to tell when I am doing things on my own is when I begin to feel weary.  God's yoke is easy and his burden is light. Once things begin to feel unnecessarily difficult and heavy, you need to check your heart and get on your knees concerning the issue.

About 4 months later, the relationship ended painfully. My heart was broken and at first I couldn't see past all that pain. With time, it however passed and gave way to relief. I felt free, as though a huge burden had been lifted off my shoulders. Shortly after, I began dating the man who is currently my husband. He had been in my life for many years and I never saw him as anything but a friend. I had to let go of the love I had set up for myself in order to receive the love that God had set apart for me. It has been a beautiful journey so far and I can honestly say that I have never experienced this level of peace and acceptance with another person in my entire life.

While I was praying to God to let me keep the love I thought was all I could ever hope for, he had someone else more in line with my life's purpose for me. God knows me way better than I could ever know myself and even more, he knows every single person dead and alive. This means that the perspective he has concerning situations is something you could never even dream about even if you had the imagination and wisdom of a million men.

In Conclusion

I don't know about you, but I trust God way more than I trust myself. I am positive that his purpose for my life is perfect and he knows how to give his children good gifts. Instead of occupying my time worrying about life and how I can ensure that things go the way I would want them to, I would much rather they go His way.  I choose instead to focus on pleasing him and obeying his word as he has instructed. He will take care of everything else. (Seek ye first the kingdom of God and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you- Matthew 6:33).